Clippy

Kliptheros the Fourth slept for a long time.  Without the senses of the armor, he had no way of knowing exactly how long.  It could have been eons, or mere moments, but it felt like a long time.  Yet, he refused to lose hope.  Always before, someone would reactivate him.  Even when his master died, he would inevitably reincarnate as a new champion of the Unconquered Sun and retrieve Kliptheros’s celestial battle armor.  Thus, Kliptheros waited within the yasal crystal that contained his powerful spirit essence.  Disconnected from the armor, Kliptheros could take no action to speed things along, but as an immortal, he could afford to wait.  Eventually, his master would be back.

* * *

1500 Years Later

Power surged into Kliptheros’s crystal.  Finally, he was one with his armor again!  What’s more, the armor’s attunement resonated so powerfully that the wearer must be not only a Solar Exalted, but also the true owner of the armor!

“Greetings, master!”  Despite the mechanical voice of the armor, Kliptheros’s overjoyed enthusiasm was obvious as it echoed inside the armor’s helmet. “You can’t imagine how exciting this is! To finally have you return after… updating system clock… over a millennia!”

The only response from the huge barbarian who had donned the armor was a grunt.

“Err… master?”

“Who the fuck are you, and why are you talking?” boomed a deep bass.

“Why, I am the god of your armor, of course!  My name is Kliptheros the Fourth. I am the intelligent user interface of your Mark IV Orichalcum Celestial Battle Armor, and I will be happy to assist you! I can provide graphical user interfacing, use of spirit charms, tactical advice, and more!  I—“

“Clippy.”

“Beg your pardon, sir?”

“I will call you Clippy,” claimed the barbarian in a matter-of-fact manner.

“But, but sir, that is not my name! I am Kliptheros the Fourth!”

“Am I not your master?” The giant man’s voice sounded amused now.

“Yes, but–“

“Then your name is Clippy. Also, I would prefer if you kept your chatter to a minimum. You are strange and off-putting.”

Kliptheros mentally sighed. This was going to be a long Exaltation.

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